One day at a time . The truth is that I thought that I could do it all by myself . The shame, the pain, the disaster that I had created was my life. No hope, no life . I had a problem and his name was me.
— We (pen name)
Archive for the ‘drug abuse’ Category
I Had A Problem And It Was Me….
Tuesday, September 29th, 2009How To Break a 500 Dollar-Per-Day Addiction…
Saturday, September 19th, 2009I was severely addicted to drugs since the age of 15. I’ve been clean for 20 years now!
I went from a $500+ a day habit, to quitting cold turkey!
First I put my baby son before my own wants & needs; and most importantly I allowed my Higher Power-God, into my heart and life!
It took the brink of death, for me to realize I did have something to live for- others!
But I believe that if I could stop and change my own life around, from the living hell I existed in, then anyone can.
Move away, start fresh, allow your own Higher Power into your life! I have faith in you!!!
Allow your heart to guide you! When you learn to live again, you will soon see-that life is truly Worth living!!!
- Submitted By KAN
You Can Overcome Addiction and Abuse…
Friday, September 18th, 2009
I’ve overcome sexual abuse by my father, forced prostitution, drug abuse; and severe depression! Now I’m working with a disability situation while raising my 2 nieces to stop the cycle of abuse!
-Anonymous…. [Person's name intentionally kept confidential - this will only be changed if specifically requested by the person contributing the story. I strongly urge anonymity]
What’s Your Choice?!
Monday, January 19th, 2009
Don't get stuck in a bottle...
It continues to amaze me, some times even daily…, this lack of knowledge and ignorance that people – in general, have.
Then again, I read *somewhere* that 58 % (per cent) of American adults never read a book after high school, and that 70 % (per cent) haven’t been in a book store. And if those figures are transferable to the entire world, it’s not just sad. It’s downright tragic!
Education is important. Knowledge is power!
So I guess that give’s you one part of the explanation as to why I am continuously amazed – some times even daily, about the lack of knowledge and ignorance amongst people in general, particularly when the addiction disease is the topic of a discussion…
There are mainly two aspects of the addiction disease most people don’t understand, or are fully able to comprehend – at all…
The first is that addiction is a disease – and that it’s completely comparable with for instance allergy.
Side note – Questions:
You wouldnʼt give an apple to someone whoʼs allergic to apples – and would die of eating it, now would you?!
So why do you continue to offer alcohol – or any other drug, to an addict?!
Besides from the undisputed fact that the addiction disease is a deadly disease, it is also a two-parted disease;
First: You got the mental part of the disease, or as I prefer to call it: The mental insanity side of the disease.
The part that has complete control over your mind, your thoughts, your good and bad behaviour, your full subconscious inner-self.
The part that subconsciously and constantly speculates, calculates, make plans, comes up with new, plausible and not so plausible explanations, bad, poor and flimsy excuses, so that consumption can continue in loneliness with “somewhat” peace of mind…
Secondly: You got the physical part of the disease.
The part the controls your body, how it physically works and functions.
The part that – even though your addiction disease abuse might have caused various, numerous, life-threatening and life-challenging damages on your body and its organs, makes it ache and crave for more. Much more…
Whether you are addicted to alcohol, drugs, pills, a combined abuser (a+d+p), sex, shopping, gambling, training, work – you name it, ALL variations of an addiction disease has one main common denominator that lies as “the root” of it all – to call it that.
Since we are all cultural diversified individuals and live cultural diversified life’s, each addiction disease variation spreads out from this core root and leads to numerous and various results, diversified and different subsequent consequences.
Picture or visualize it like this:
The addiction disease is like the root of a tree, and each addiction variation of the disease is like the branches that grows and spreads out from the tree’s trunk.
If you look close enough, they all “look” quite differently, they all “grows” quite differently, they all “spreads out” quite differently, they all “behave” quite differently and the “final results” are quite, quite differently.
I am a recovering alcoholic, 41 years of age and I had a 22 year long addiction abuse “career” before I hit my rock bottom. During this period of time I have abused alcohol, drugs, pills and I have combined all mentioned in multiple combination, but my main addiction has always been alcohol. That’s what started it all…
I have been through a six week “life-style-changing” treatment program, and I have been provided with the right and proper tools to live a sober life. I have, among many, many other major, important and life changing discoveries, gotten a better understanding of my addiction disease.
I remember that, four weeks into this program, a female (alcohol addict) participant received a written invitation from some family members or close friends, for an upcoming wedding or big birthday party that – among many quite sensational and remarkable things said: “… You can drink red wine, now that you been through this 6 week alcoholic treatment program now can’t you???” … (I am NOT kidding!)
I mean – seriously! Come on!
It does make you wonder if this person actually thought and believed that this was a 6 week learn-how-to-drink program…
It also makes you wonder what “lack-of-knowledge” or plain, downright stupid and ignorant “life-bubble” some people actually live in…
I don’t hold it against them. I have learned not to. Because they do not know. They are uninformed, uneducated and ignorant individuals.
If you don’t have an open and unprejudiced mind, you are not able to learn about, gain insight into, fully understand or fully comprehend all aspects of an addiction disease – at all.
I have, since I left this program, watched and listened to a great number of other alcoholics, drug addicts and combined addicts share their life’s experiences with others, and what changes the six week “life-style-changing” treatment program has made on them personally, their values, their beliefs and the new-born hope and faith they have obtained for The New Life that lies ahead.
As with everything else in life, some with more realism, truthfulness, sincerity and trustworthiness than others…
Side note: It’s all in the mirror – remember?!
They have – like me, been provided with the right and proper tools to make the right choices in life.
How we choose to use these tools, are entirely up to us…
Even though I have learned a lot from watching and listening to this variety of addicts, the one person that – still to this day, have given me (being addicted to alcohol) the very most, and that reflected in my mirror in the strongest, hardest and most equal way, was a person that was addicted to gambling!
Think THROUGH THAT for a few moments…
I donʼt normally give book recommendations, but I will make one important exception:
“The Big Book” (Alcoholics Anonymous)
AAʼs entire organization is built upon the visionary steps and principles of this great book. And multiple anonymous addiction disease groupings have grown – and spread out, from this root over the years.
AA’s twelve step program is – in its core essence, a “Life-Style-Changing”-program. It’s “An Easy Program” for “Complicated Human Beings”!
It’s a book written almost 100 years ago, but it could just as well have been written today, and be valid for the next one hundred years to come.
There are three ways to read this book.
Which way you choose to read it, is entirely up to you.
I share this book with you with a sincere hope for a bigger insight in – and a better understanding of, the addiction disease and for freedom from co-addiction-dependency throughout a biggest possible joy of Life and fully self-experienced peace of mind.
An upmost friendly advice:
If you haven’t had enough (addiction disease) “beating”, and – if you are the one and only GOD in your own life – it’s not recommended reading…
You always have a choice;
To do this – or that… Follow this path – or that… Live – or die…
Lack of knowledge, pure ignorance and plain stupidity may kill you – or someone you love and/or care much about…
It’s not a game. It’s deadly serious.
What’s your choice?!
- or should I dare say “excuse”…?!
“The Viking”
*Please submit your anonymous stories here for the purpose of helping those addicted to drugs and alcohol or those who love them.
Teetering on the Edge…
Sunday, January 4th, 2009
Don't go over the edge!
In August of 1995 I had literally come to the end of the road. I was sitting on a rock out on Montauk Point LI NY staring out into the darkness at the Atlantic Ocean.
My life seemed pointless, I felt worthless as a parent, friend and in every aspect of my life. Drugs including alcohol were no longer giving me any relief from the emptiness and worthlessness that I felt inside. I no longer could pretend to myself or others that I was OK. I could no longer function in society and my life was unmanageable in every area. I wanted to die and as I sat out there in the dark all I wanted to do was summon up the courage to jump out into the ocean and end my life. I cried , I screamed out to the god I no longer believed in to help me jump.
I was out of money. I had no real friends. My ex-wife and 2 children had lost all respect for me, the engine in my car was shot, and I could no longer function at work. I was way beyond hopelessness ,deeply disturbed, despairing of the mess I had created in my active addiction. And I didn’t realize that I had a choice. Death seemed to be the only alternative.
A few hours passed by and I still didn’t jump. The sky was beginning to lighten up in the east and either I didn’t have the guts to end my life or a higher power was looking out for me. The first rays of the sun beaned across the ocean and hit me directly in the eyes, an unexpected sense of calmness came over me. I realized that I wasn’t going to die on this day and I needed help. I no longer could keep drinking and drugging , perhaps I wasn’t as useless and alone as i felt. I had a small glimpse of hope.
I got back into the borrowed car that I was driving and returned it to my using buddy. She took one look at me and told me that we were going to a meeting. She was going to stop using again and I should go with her. I don’t remember too much about the meeting except it was a basement room filled with addicts who shared about what was going on in their lives.
I heard people sharing about losing jobs, lovers, their friends to the disease of addiction and some from AIDS. And everyone that shared ended by saying ” and I didn’t find it necessary to use today”. Wow what a concept! Could I really change, was I no longer alone? (to be continued)
- anonymous submission by ‘Rob’.
To All: Please submit your thoughts, ideas and / or stories about drug and alcohol addiction / abuse here.
Addiction and Self-Esteem or Self Worth
Tuesday, December 30th, 2008Linda wrote in to share:
“The problem is not the addiction itself but the deeper issue of how the person sees himself. I believe we need more programs to assist people to see the greatness in themselves, to build up their sense of self worth, to discover that they too occupy a valuable place on this planet.
No one is here by accident. We all have the opportunity to start again IF the individual really wants to improve their life. Help will always appear if the want is there. David, you are a beacon in the dark for those who want to live in the light.”
Thank you Linda. Your words are very powerful and I believe they will help people who come to visit this site. And I agree with you – many times what is hidden behind an addiction is an insecurity or low self-esteem. Sometimes, there may be other things at play. But many times it very well could be an insecurity and a person’s sense of self worth.
I had a friend who was a psychologist and most of his practice was based on improving a person’s self worth. He had techniques that people could use to improve their self esteem. Some of his ideas were very interesting…
Thank you again Linda.
To All: Please submit your comments, ideas and / or stories about drug and alcohol addiction / abuse here.
Interview with Drug Dealer’s Ex-Girlfriend…
Thursday, December 25th, 2008
Drugs Hurt Everyone
Question:
Do you know any drug or alcohol related stories?
Answer: I had a boyfriend long ago. I did not know that he was taking drugs and selling. But, at the moment I realized this – I went away.
Question: Yes, and what happened next?
Answer: Have not seen him anymore. Don´t know. But to be with him would mean that I accept the way he is living.
He takes money for something which destroys people.
Question: Do you think he should pay for his crimes?
Answer: He will, I´m sure. Because he takes drugs himself. Otherwise, there are some other [higher] powers.
Question: Do you know any of the people that he has hurt?
Answer: No. But I heard from other people he did.
Question: How do you feel about drug use in general?
Answer: It’s a way to eliminate feelings, or to get great feelings for a moment – to forget the world and life. But, for this you have to pay a big price.
Question: And do you think it is good for people to forget for a while?
Answer: Maybe a way of meditation is a better way. It is in your control. You are not controlled by something that you cannot get rid of anymore.
Drug Sales Aid The Taliban Terrorists
Tuesday, December 23rd, 2008
Terrorists Sell Drugs
Not long ago, I reported my suspicion that terrorists were selling drugs that ended up in US citizens hands in a double expression of hatred.
First, they enjoy hurting US citizens via drug addiction. Second they use the money coming from the drug trade to Americans to feed their terrorist machines.
Well, earlier today, and I apologize for not having a link handy, I read an article on CNN about an Afghanistan Taliban who had been extradited to the US to stand trial for drug trafficking.
I don’t remember if it was heroin or opium but he was actually caught on tape expressing how much he loved selling drugs that were destined for America – because he hated Americans.
The judge threw the book at him. He pleaded for his wife and child and asked for just a few years because of them. The judge countered that he pleaded for his wife and child but expressed zero remorse for the lives that he harmed with his drug trade and for being a Taliban.
He said that ‘everyone’ in his village sells drugs and that you cannot live if you do not sell them.
So there you have it. Again, I apologize for not having the link but I clicked off the story and couldn’t find it again.
So you see, if you are addicted to a drug, it is very possible that your money is actually helping to feed terrorist organizations who will use the funds to attack and kill more Americans – because they hate us. In addition, they enjoy seeing you addicted so that they can harm you in that way too.
Don’t let them take advantage this way.
Submit your anonymous drug or alcohol abuse / addiction story for the purpose of giving motivation, inspiration or hope to someone who is addicted to drugs or alcohol or for someone who loves someone who is!
Leave a comment if you found this story interesting.
The Complicated World of Addiction and Control…
Saturday, December 20th, 2008
Last night or rather this morning, I sent a letter out to some friends about this site and the importance of it. This was the response that I received from one my friends:
“Dear David: Unfortunately for most a merely (social drink) turns into a habit, and ruins the individual-as well as those within the influence of the imbiber. In the socialist Society, alcohol is called the (opium of the people). So the weakening of the will,and the control of the tyrants -is made easier for them by a drinking population…”
Very interesting, isn’t it. Those who seek to control others would like to see us drug and alcohol addicted. Maybe it is a concept that you would dismiss? But, in certain times and certain circumstances, it may very well be true.
Here was the original note I sent out about this site:
Acknowledging that drugs and alcohol is a big problem in our society and in fact, virtually all communities across the world,
I’ve decided that I want to do something about it.
Drug and alcohol abuse is a serious problem and I believe it will continue to grow – and it will attempt to engulf our children and other vulnerable loved ones. This is a problem that will not find a social or community based solution.
However, there is a way to fix it. But it is merely on the individual level. This is because each person has a choice to be addicted or not. Yes, it takes a strong will to break an addiction – and to keep that addiction broken. But it has been done before and can be
done again – if only the will is there.
That is why I created a new site.
Please join me by reading the stories and possibly sharing your own at :
http://www.drugabusefocus.com/add-your-drug-or-alcohol-story/
You can do it anonymously too – Unless you choose not to. Sharing your story will be good for you and good for others too.
But if you are content just to read the other stories there already – by all means, feel free.
Please help by spreading the NEWS about this site. Together we can build a resource that will serve all communities world wide by sharing stories – good and bad – in order to help people see and understand the reality of drug or alcohol use and abuse.
Drug Addictions and Alcohol Addictions Harm & Destroy Human Lives
Thursday, December 18th, 2008
Let's Trade....
Years after I left my home town I returned only to learn about some really sad stories. I kind of felt left out of the crowd a lot of times when I was growing up. Sometimes I was in, sometimes out. But that is OK, because what I learned about some of the things happening there is a bit MORE than scary.
Perhaps when you read this, you will think I was naive. Or perhaps you will be as shocked as I was. There was a neighborhood in my school district that was a bit far away from mine, yet the kids there were into some heavy stuff.
As it turns out, those kids, which were mostly male as far as I know, would trade sex to other kids for drugs. I imagine they also traded sex with adults for drugs too.
Even as I think of it now, it makes me very uncomfortable to know that was going on. Who knows the extend of it? I only heard that little bit. The identities of the people involved are not important nor would I ever disclose them even if I did know the names of those involved. But my heart is saddened by the news of these stories.
If you know of stories like this one, please share them anonymously (of course). The reason to share them is to help others understand the vulnerabilities that drug addictions create in us. We have to help others to understand. In that way, we may be able to prevent more sadness like this.
Human beings should live with dignity and not be subjected to having sex with someone they don’t want to have sex with, just for the sake of feeding an addiction. Sex was created to be an act of love and procreation, it is not or should not be an item of commerce to obtain drugs and / or alcohol in order to feed a sick addiction – or feed the depravity of a dealer for that matter.
